Who’s the Daddy: Suffering from a case of the blues

The Saturday before Christmas, me and a supporting Blues buddy that I’ve been friends with since the late 1980s saw his childhood team get spanked by the Blackburn Rovers at Ewood Park.

What struck me on the other side (apart from the two blue flares launched above our heads in the six-meter area after Blackburn’s third entered) was the sheer number of people. from Birmingham who have taken the time of their lives to make the 220-mile round trip to watch a team from nothing.

Each of them deserves a refund and a handwritten letter of apology from the manager. Usually I would also demand a shirt signed by the first team, but the kit they arrived in looked like something out of a toddler paint box. I don’t know much about Boys In Royal Blue but their traditional colors aren’t an orange and snot green tiger print. No idea what colorblind idiot at Nike signed this one, but it does look like the aura around a migraine.

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Who’s the dad

Thanks in large part to Peaky Blinders, the Birmingham accent is no longer the most effective contraceptive known to man. At first, the Blues fans were a jovial, albeit lively group who seemed like they had been through a lot together. The mood only worsened after Chilean folk hero Ben Brereton Diaz calmly sent his shot on goal to give the Rovers the advantage 3-0 with half an hour of torture to go.

There is no place more lonely than the end of a soccer field when the home team is tearing your team to pieces. The colossal roar that greets each goal sounds like a personal insult.

Honestly, they might as well be shouting “Your father is dead”, “Your grown-up kids are angry with you” and “Your wife has heard everything you have to say and misses you”. Or maybe I read too much there. After 80 minutes of 4-0 pounding, we had seen enough. It was like watching a beloved sleeping pet. Worse?

How could it be worse? How about a £ 35 parking ticket that greeted my boyfriend on his return to his car? Yeah, it’s worse.

About Jerry Richter

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